Keeping score

I have been coaching soccer for one of my kids' soccer teams for about six years - both my son and my younger daughter, although not during the same season.

I did not grow up playing the sport - it was not common in my small town in western Pa. when I was a youth - but I do enjoy coaching it.

Each of my kids are learning the game and getting better. And, their dad is getting better as a coach. Progress is wonderful, but it takes time, and comes in fits and starts.

My overall goals for youth team athletics - regardless of the particular sport - are always the same.

I want people to gain new athletic skills, self-confidence, and fitness; to learn to be a part of a team; to focus on daily and season-long goals; and to gain life lessons, many of which come from practice, hard work, competition, and experiencing winning and losing.

You will notice that I did not say "have fun." I do want them to have fun. However, team sports take up too much effort by parents for "fun" to be the only or even primary objective.

By the way, we have always kept score in our games when I coach.

My reason is simple: I want kids to experience and demonstrate both winning with grace and losing with dignity. I want their reaction at the end of the game during the handshake line to be the same, win or lose. We can't learn those lessons if we don't keep score.

And in reality, the kids are keeping score anyway. So we may as well get a life lesson out of it.