Again and again

In summer 2015, I had a revelation one day as I was sitting in my family room.

My surprising discovery:  I was not getting any younger. Yes, I know.

Anyway, I realized that I needed to do something to get in shape, although I wasn't quite sure what that would be.

So I called up a friend of mine, whom I knew worked out at a CrossFit gym somewhere, and asked if he could take me for a sample class. I learned that the gym happened to be on the way to my kids school, but I had never noticed it. Then again, I had never joined a gym before, so I hadn't been looking for it.

My friend Daniel took me to a sample 7 am class.

And, I found it very difficult. To be fair, I only had a vague idea of what CrossFit might be before arriving, so I don't know if it was more or less challenging than expected, since I didn't really have an expectation.

Nonetheless, after the class, and after doing 3 introductory foundations sessions, I made up my mind that I wanted to give this a shot.

So, naturally I signed up for a 6 am CrossFit class. Five days per week.

I dove right in.

And, I was not very good.

In fact, I consistently finished last, or almost last, on the daily WOD ("workout of the day") scoreboard. Every day, week after week.

And, upon returning home at a few minutes after 7 every morning, l proceeded to tell my kids that I had finished last or almost last.

Again.

Week after week. With little obvious gains, initially.

My wife Claire was initially a little worried about this. I think her concern was how this might impact our kids, in terms of their perception of their father.

I too was conscious about the kids' perception of me. But I had a lesson that I wanted to attempt to impart.

To be clear: I did want my kids to know that I was consistently finishing last, or almost last. Again and again.

Because I had no intention of finishing last forever. And I wanted my kids to see me struggle, with something I was not very good at, and not quit. While the process of getting better can be and is frustrating - no question about it, CrossFit is hard, at least for me - I wanted them to see me try, again and again, and not be (too) embarrassed about my current reality. In other words, to see me respect myself, and respect the process. And be resilient in the face of a challenge.

And, little by little, I got better.

Long story short, while CrossFit is still very challenging, and I still finish last every now and again, I am now more likely to be closer to the top, or least near the middle of the leaderboard, than to the bottom.

Even better, I have lost about 25 pounds or so since I started. That is at least substantially due to diet in addition to working out, and worthy of a future blog post.

The "secret" for me over the past 12-18 months is both very hard - CrossFit is hard - and very simple. Desire comes first, then determination, and then consistency. Any "results" that come are just that, the natural result, and largely out of your control.

My son's soccer practice habits this winter are another example of this. He practices soccer a few minutes every night, night after night, in order to get better at juggling. He is getting better, and it is a joy to see - both the result, and the process.

In fact, as a father, watching my son or daughters embrace the process of growth is in many ways more rewarding than the actual result. It doesn't matter how hard something is. Just keep on keeping on, and respect the process.

Joe Milazzo II